GO CRAZY!!! (Does anyone else know what that line's from? I bet my brother Josh will know.)
At Sophie's 2 year check up last week I asked the doctor how much TV watching is ok? Do you know what she said? NONE is ideal and 1 hour a day max!! Say WHAAAAAAT??? Either I am the worst parent ever or these are unrealistic expectations.
It reminds me of an Everybody Loves Raymond episode where Ray disciplines their daughter Ali by taking TV away from her for a week. The next day Deborah says to Ray, "You know, when you take TV away from Ali, you are punishing me too!"
Sophie loves movies and TV and they can keep her out of trouble and out of my hair from time to time during the day when I need to either take care of Tessa or get something done (imagine that!). Since the doctor's we've been trying to only let her watch 1 movie a day, which usually comes first thing in the morning because she's been waking up at 5 or 6 lately and the first words out of her mouth are what movies she wants to watch. Not in the mood to play Dan or I (whoever got up with her that morning) turns the movie on and falls asleep on the couch while Sophie watches it. So the rest of the day I am made to suffer!
Sophie's driving me crazy. Every time I turn around she has destroyed something else or has hurt herself. Sophie's not very good at playing by herself, she doesn't last with her toys more than 10 minutes w/o me. Then she's at my feet whining about something while I frantically try to do my hair or clean the toilet w/o her getting injured or too loud as to wake Tessa. Yesterday we were preparing dinner and she was grabbing knifes off the counter, reaching towards the hot stove, going through the garbage and sitting in Tessa's bouncer... just complete mayhem. How do you good parents do it? How do you get everything done in one day without the help of the boob-tube?
I think it will help when the weather's a bit better and we can get outside during the day. I am afraid that the combination of a newborn and winter weather make for difficult times. The doctor recommended I "just put her in school a couple days a week." I all but laughed out loud... I guess since she makes so much money (her husband is a doctor too) she forgets that there is no way we people like us could afford something like that. I want a zoo pass. And a membership at the Children's museum.
15 comments:
Just so you know, I don't know anyone who limits TV THAT much. So, either I don't know any "good" parents, or it is unrealistic. I would ease up a bit on the rule or you'll go crazy....especially right now while you are adjusting to two....then reconsider when life gets a little more manageable. But good luck with whatever you do.
I know how you feel. My pediatrician told me absolutely NO TV until 3-not even baby development movies or anything. I have hit on a compromise in my book. We watch cartoons in the morning (or a movie in Sophie case...) Then we have some books on CD that Aspen loves, or we have music CD's on all the time to try and distract her. And then when it comes to dinner time and the occasional mid day shower, we watch something. Now that Aspen is older we've been watching a lot of PBS cartoons :). So in total (not counting Aspen's 'Nap movie' for my sanity) we watch 1 1/2-2 hrs a day, but in 30-45 min segments. What I try to do is remember to not just leave the tv on. It is a bad habit and one I've had to break myself of. You never know what is going to flash on that tv-even on the Disney Channel!!! Good luck, I know Sophie is at an adventurous age and adding a baby to that is a challenge. Either way, now you are a GOOD MOM! You love your girls and are trying your best!
TV in the morning is a lifesaver!!! I turn the TV on for Ava so that I can get ready for the day. It is probably on for an hour and a half in the mornings and then she watches a movie in the afternoon. It is SO hard to entertain in the winter so don't feel guilty AT ALL. Sophie is really smart from what I have seen on your blog. My mom tells me that I turned out just fine and I watched a lot of TV so I try not to worry about it!!
That sounds just like our morning routine! Porter wakes up, askes to bring his blanket, he plops himself on the couch and asks for a show! While I snuggle with him and "rest" I don't worry about it too much. Nither shounld you!!
I don't know what to tell you about keeping Sophie busy. Porter is a great self entertainer. Ellery on the other hand, I'm sure she will be a lot more like Sophie! So you will have to let me know what you figure out.
I agree with everyone else....it's personal preference on how much TV is a good/bad thing. Noah went through a stage just about the same age as Sophie is right now where all he wanted to do was watch TV, and he too couldn't play without me. Good news, it gets better. He plays a lot better with himself now and we've been able limited TV to about 11/2 per day without too much fuss. I disagree when people, even doctors, tell you how to parent. Every child is different and it's up to the parents to decide what is right for their children. Just think of it like this...are you a better parent after Sophie watches a little TV and you have some time for yourself, or should you go crazy and be a less effective parent just to meet the so called expectation of NO TV. Moderation in all things!!
It's definitely a personal decision. I don't think that TV will hinder a child's development. However, Lily wasn't allowed to watch TV until was 2 and then it was very minimal. Like I said, I don't believe that TV will hinder, but I think that having little TV time during the day is a great thing. It can promote a child to use their imagination and learn to find entertainment in other things, like books. Yes, of course that means that they do get into more stuff, but they learn how to do more things on their own. We studied this very thing when I was going through the Early Childhood Education program at USU. Kids that can learn to entertain themselves by using their own creativity and imaginations end up doing a lot better. Of course, not in all cases. I know several parents that would argue the other side of that. There is moderation in all things. I know way too many parents who use TV as a babysitter for their kids. There are times when you need to just turn on the TV so you can get some stuff done. However, some parents get way to out of hand with that and have the TV on all day, everyday, all the time. To those parents I always want to say, "Why did you have kids, if you aren't going to spend any time with them!" That is obviously not you at all!!!! You are such a great mom and you will figure out what is best for your family. With Harrison being so sick , you better believe I'm going to take full advantage of our TV while we are all trying to get better and get more sleep. As of recently though, Tag and I have started feeling like the TV watching is getting out of hand at our house, not just by Lily but by us. To remedy that, the cable guy is coming tomorrow to turn off our cable. We love that Lily can play all day with her toys and books and not have to watch one show. I think she has enjoyed Harrison getting so sick because she is already on her 3rd movie today :) Passes to the zoo and museum definitely help. We just got a pass to the museum. If you get one let me know. I would love to go with you!
I agree with Liz. One hour a day sounds good, but unless you have a self entertainer or you are willing to play all day it is a little unrealistic. A backyard would be nice. :) I have found getting outside really helps Paul redirect his focus. Our zoo pass has been a life saver. If you end up getting one you can call me anytime; we're always up for the zoo.
Easy, its from the Simpsons - "no TV and no beer make Homer go crazy!" I love that one :)
I think that a doctor that thinks a 2 year old should be in preschool is not to be trusted with knowing what's best for kids.
I second what your mom said! Also just try and do your best everyday. I try and do however much she plays outside she can watch TV too. That is hard in the winter. But try some art projects too. Your doing great though, keep up the good work!
I agree with everyone else!!! And I love that you called it the boob-tube! My mom would always call it that.
Tell your Ped that she is nuts! Austin plays better with his toys and by himself when the TV is on wether he watches it or not. Most of the time he doesn't just sit and watch, he does occasionally but I don't think it's all bad. He has learned the entire alphabet from watching Super Why on PBS!!! He knows all his colors from watching Cars the movie because he remebers what car is which color! I don't think it's as bad as the Dr's say. They have nothing to blame the cause of ADD and ADHD on so they blame it on too much TV as children. In my opinion it's crap! You are a great mother and during the winter if you choose to let your children watch tv I think they will be fine. The summer it much easier with a baby (i'm hoping) because then we can go outside but until then, let Disney do it's job!!!!!
I think we are really similar. Everything you are going through so am I! Everything Sophie is doing, Brinklee is too, everything you worry about so do I! I don't know what I would do without tv. I have used tv to keep me sane. I will try and watch it with her as much as possible and we'll talk about what is going on in the show and that way I can (hopefully) use it more as a learning tool, where we count, dance, figure out situations, etc... and not feel as guilty in that. Brinklee is WAY ahead of schedule, so the doc says, and she watches quite a bit of tv, so I try not to worry about it. However, I am like you, I feel guilty letting her watch 3 mickey mouse episodes in a row because she wants to. Oh! Parenting is so hard to know what the right thing to do is.
I disagree with some people. If you could afford it preschool is always amazing for a kid. I mean you should not go crazy but I would try doing a preschool with people you know or something because it is not about how smart she is it is about so many other things. But the TV, well I have not kids and really have no idea what I would do. You are amazing and are always doing what is best. You truly are one amazing mother. Smile lots.
Summer
All I know is the best place for any child is at home with his/her mom who loves them. Wether you are interacing with them while they are watching TV or interacting with them while the tv is off --I think the point is that you don't just plop them in front of a "boob tube" and ignore them for too long(heaven knows that I definitely use tv as a tool more than I should) but ideally they should be learning at your side. I think and have observed that little kids do not need institutionalized learning at Sophie's age. School will come soon enough. We have such a short time that they are just ours- why not enjoy every second of it?
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